She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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