I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
