There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
