worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Sorry about my life...
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
