It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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