Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Randomize
