i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems