I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
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