No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Randomize
