Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
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