I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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