dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Randomize
