My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize