Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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