dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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