Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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