ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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