Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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