He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
