singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
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