god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Also, beer. Big fan.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Randomize
