dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Randomize
