...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
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