Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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