Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
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