Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
