This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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