I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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