I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Randomize
