i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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