Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
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