..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
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