Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
