When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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