did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
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