I'm jealous of your bromance
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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