Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize