Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
