Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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