you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
