Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
