We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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