no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.