why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Randomize
