Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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