i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
