Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
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