Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
