I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize