I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize