i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
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